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If Operating Systems Ran the Airlines

 
UNIX Airways
          Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the
  airport.  They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by
  piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
  building.

Air DOS
          Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and
  let the plane coast until it hits the ground again.  Then they push again,
  jump on again, and so on...

Mac Airlines
          All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look
  and act exactly the same.  Every time you ask questions about details, you
  are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know,
  and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so
  just shut up.

Windows Air
          The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy
  baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off.  After about 10 minutes
  in the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows NT Air
          Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and
  takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

Linux Air
          Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start
  their own airline.  They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the
  runways themselves.  They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing
  the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.  When
  you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy
  of the seat-HOWTO.html.  Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very
  comfortable, the plan leaves and arrives on time without a single problem,
  the in-flight meal is wonderful.  You try to tell customers of the other
  airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do what
  with the seat?"
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